Life After Loss Radio Show

11 Dec

In November I had the honor to be on Life After Loss, a weekly radio program dealing with issues of loss, resiliency and life, hosted by my dear friend, Carolyn Carlson

Julie Aydlott, the author of the book True Stories of Messages From Beyond, was also on.  This is the book that my story is in.

There are also many other wonderful shows archived as well.

This week’s guest was Janis Amatuzio, author of Forever Ours and Beyond Knowing.  Last week was Neale Donald Walsch, author of the Conversations with God series.  Next week’s guest is Beth Nielson Chapman, singer/song writer.

Check it out if you have some time!    www.KTOE.com

Click on LIFE AFTER LOSS found across the top of the page.

Choose to make your day great!

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Just Living Life … and loving it

7 Dec

I’ve had a few people ask me why I haven’t written in my blog for a while.  Wow … can’t believe I haven’t posted in a month.  But the truth is, I just haven’t had much to write about.

And that’s a good thing I think … I’m just living an ordinary life … and I love it!  There’s been some changes at work and I had to take on more responsibilities than I really wanted to bite off … but it’s stretched me and it’s turned out to be a very good thing. 

Home is good … my family is good … so in general LIFE IS GOOD!  Preparing for Christmas is also fun.  There’s always much that can be done … but I bite off little chunks at a time … it’s less stressful that way and I enjoy it much more.

This weekend is my baking weekend.  I bake cookies and Christmas candy for 2 days straight.  And I love it!  I crank up my Christmas CD’s and get busy.  I give most of it away and that is lots of fun as well.

Enjoy the season and each wonderful, ordinary day!

Another Not Normal Day

12 Oct

I so wanted yesterday to be a normal work day.  But it was anything but.  Another bomb threat was called into our company.  When the decision was made not to evacuate, another threat came in an hour later.

This is new territory for all concerned at our company.  After learning of the 2nd call, my supervisor sent us all home.  I really didn’t want to go … by now I’ve got to believe these calls are nothing but idle threats by someone getting their kicks by jerking us around.  But … when someone in authority tells me to do something … I listen.  So, at 10:00 am I was once again in my car headed home.

Only Roger didn’t come home … I knew he was still working … as were most everybody else in the company other than my department.  I really considered going back but thought I would probably be blocked from entering the parking lot. I thought about calling Roger, but that didn’t seem like a good idea either … so I spent another day at home … not that I mind being at home … I love being at home … but I felt like I should be at work.

An emergency employee meeting was held yesterday afternoon.  A security specialist from our company headquarters in Charlotte, NC had flown in.  There is now a $5000 reward for anyone who can provide information leading to the arrest of the caller.

But, the most un-nerving news was that they believe the calls are internal … someone inside our building is making these calls!!  

I AM going to work this morning with alittle trepidation, but mostly hope that this craziness will end.

Time is an Illusion

20 Sep

September 20th has arrived.  4 years ago today Liz left this world for the next.  It is still hard to believe.  It feels like yesterday and 100 years ago all at once.  My friend Kathryn says that time is an illusion … that concept rings so true for me today.

I had grand plans that this year I would carry on as if it were a regular day.  I would go to work and it would be just fine.  After all, I had done that on her birthday just last week and it had been a good day.

About Tuesday, however, my spirit and my body started to tell me otherwise; and thankfully, I listened.  Today is not just another day, and it never will be.   It is a day fraught with huge emotion and that will never change.

I needed to be where I felt most comforted and that for me is home.  I love my house.  It is my haven.  It is a place where I can do whatever I want, whenever I want.  I can schlep around in my PJ’s until Noon if I want to.  I can be quiet and present with my thoughts and emotions.  And some part of my daughter is always present here.

If I’ve learned anything these past 4 years it is that you have to acknowledge your feelings.  So I acknowledge my pain today.  I honor it and I call it by name.  If I do this, I know it will leave me.

If I had continued on with the charade that today is just another day I would have denied my truth and the pain would have stayed within me … only to come back on another day.

So today I claim my pain and all of my emotions and I remember the sadness and the huge loss.  To do otherwise would be a vast dis-service to my daughter.

In the end, pain DOES  give way to JOY and LAUGHTER.

Hello from Heaven

13 Sep

I brought in the mail yesterday afternoon and found a postcard from church.  They have a prayer group who meets weekly and goes through our pictorial directory and they pray for each person or family in it.  Then they send out a card saying “we prayed for you today” and they each sign their first names.

I thought oh how nice that this card arrived on Liz’s birthday … then I scanned down further to see the signature’s of those who had prayed for us.  Right there in the middle of all the names was the signature of Elizabeth!

What a wonderful gift Liz gave me on her birthday!

Happy Birthday!

12 Sep

24 years ago today I gave birth for the first time to a very beautiful baby girl whom we named Elizabeth Jean … happy birthday my precious angel girl!